There are a few of my readers who come to my blog solely for the pup pics, this post is for them. 😀
While I was completely out of my comfort zone for six days downtown, my pups were dealing with the fact that suddenly I was gone 12 hours a day. In the last nine months, I have not been gone more than two hours a week. This was a big deal for all of us. Luckily, my husband works from home so the pups were not alone, they just had to learn a slightly different method of telling him their needs. He did a great job, and the pups learned quickly that he was reliable and that they could relax. 😀
Every morning the three of them would drive me to the train station and drop me off, and return in the evening to pick me up. My husband would send me photos and texts letting me know how the pups were doing.
The first day (Wednesday) the pups were rather confused…
The next day (Thursday) they seemed to realize that I might take a bit longer than usual to get home, so they might as well soak up the sun…
Day three (Friday), luckily was a short day and I got to come home early…
After spending the weekend at home, Monday (day 4) was a bit easier for all of us, well sort of… I was only given a few breaks and a lunch, the case was really going by now. I didn’t receive any photos of the pups this day.
Tuesday (day 5) we started deliberations around 10:30 am, so I was really unable to receive texts and at lunch I was really in a space of deep thought. By lunch I already knew that the next few hours if not days were going to be hard. So far the vote was 10-2 and I was in the minority… either they were going to try to change my mind or I was going to change theirs… it was not a predicament I had ever been in before. Before leaving for the day the vote had changed to 9-3. And to add to my stress I couldn’t talk to anyone about what was going on, nor could I do any research. Tuesday night my husband understood that I would need some TV distraction from the case and the pups could sense that I was in deep thought…
Wednesday (day 6) was really hard, I had thought all night my reasons for thinking the way I did and thought I might be able to express them to change more votes. But right way the juror who had changed her mind thought she might change it back. We started going through more evidence and some jurors, (about 3 of them) refused to look any more because their minds were made up. I was angry, I had thought about my vote all night and felt we should deliberate further… but their minds were set. In case you are unaware, in a criminal case it has to be unanimous (either guilty or not guilty)… the day droned on… the juror changed her mind, others were more sure of their vote, and it was back to 10-2… we broke for lunch in the middle of listening to more testimony. After lunch we finished listening to testimony, and voted again. 10-2… no one was going to change their vote. Finally we sent a message to the judge to see what the next step was when we were obviously a hung jury. We waited in awkwardness for about an hour, bringing up any topic except the case. We were finally called back into court and after the foreperson explained that we were not going to ever come to a unanimous vote, the court proceeded with the task of finishing up the court proceedings that deal with a hung jury. We were finally relieved of our jury duty around 4:30 pm.
I did get this photo of Duke’s butt at some point in my day 😀
I spent the next three days decompressing and telling my husband all about the case. I stand by my vote and after being able to do some research I am even more confident of my choice. The whole experience has left me feeling frustrated and angry. I was looping in my mind, trying to decide if I had done enough, could I have said something else to change their votes? In the end I have to believe that I did all I could have done. I am not good at public speaking nor debate and it was a really hard week for me. During deliberations, my hands were sweaty, my armpits were wet and I was shaking a little. But I believed in my decision and stood my ground… and for that I am oddly proud of myself.
Now I’m trying to figure out how I can be the person I wanted to be when I was a kid. When I was a kid I was a lot more outgoing and fearless, now I’m basically a hermit and uncomfortable around lots of people. When I was a kid I wanted to help people, I still do. I’m just not sure yet how that will unfold. This case has lit a fire in me and I’m not sure what to do about it. But I’m thinking on it and hope that 12 year old me will one day be happy with who I’ve become.
Whoa that got deep… how about some food pics?
Much like my zentangle, I can see my mind in my food choices… I went to Panera each day (except Friday) because it is a known good and I didn’t want to deal with an upset stomach from a new restaurant…
I know I’ve been writing for three posts now about my jury experience. Like I said it had a profound effect on me and I’m trying to figure out where to go next.
Until next time…
~nic
Photography by Nic 